Memo

TO: Preschooler
FROM: Mom

All the screaming, hitting and crying at nap time doesn't help your case that you do, in fact, NOT need a nap. Rather such behavior confirms that your napping is not only a good idea, but extremely necessary. In the event that we could trade places, I'd be happy for someone to shove me into a dark room with a bunch of fluffy stuffed animals. Please fold the laundry and refrain from climbing over the back of the couch.

Don't be jealous of my fabulous life.

You can too actively ignore something

Today I have:

* dropped and broke my water bottle at the gym, effectively delaying the start of rowing class by several minutes.
* attempted to discover the best way to de-seed watermelon as there were no seedless available at the grocery yesterday.
* colored Elmo and My Little Ponies while actively ignoring the fact that my toes badly need to be repainted.
* frozen trash.

Don't be jealous of my fabulous life.

Nerdy, Late-Night Edition

I was just watching Conan and they had a Voldemort look-a-like on. He spoke and I told Josh he was more like the weird uncle on The Adams Family than Voldemort - something about the cadence and raspiness of his voice was wrong. Oh my word, I'm a big ol' Harry Potter NERD.

Don't be jealous of my fabulous life.

Captain Readerpants

Mom needs a little time to herself to maintain her sanity, so daily my daughter takes a nap and my son reads. My son is now reading chapter books on his own and I'm SO thankful that means I no longer have to read Captain Underpants. At least until my daughter is old enough to want to read them.

Don't be jealous of my fabulous life.

Hear, hear

I just had to put my hand on the dishwasher to make sure it was running. (It was.) I know it's been a long time since we have had a dishwasher that was reasonably quiet, because the kids are amazed. By the dishwasher. Perhaps I shouldn't have waited to replace it until the old one became destined for the crusher.

Don't be jealous of my fabulous life.

Let there be (efficient) light

When we moved into our house, lo those five plus years ago, there were light bulbs in the fixtures. They were the normal bulbs and not the lovely (and cooler in rooms with lots of bulbs - important in my hot climate) energy-efficient bulbs that I would have purchased. It seemed so wasteful to just pull out the old bulbs that worked fine and how long could they last, really?

Evidently a long, long time.

Today I treated myself - the eight hot light bulbs in my bathroom are replaced! Perhaps I shouldn't wait five years to treat myself like this again. Aren't I worth $10 in bulbs? Don't answer that.

Heavy machinery

I was helping my daughter learn to use the appropriate amount of sanitary paper today. We have been talking about how two squares (and not ten) is plenty for number one. She was meticulously folding the tissue and announces, "I makin' an airplane, Mommy!" I'm going stop right there.

Don't be jealous of my fabulous life.